My extra special boy.

Alas, it has been 48 hours and James has not yet left the building ... uh, body. Sadly, I guess the sweep didn't work, but it was worth a try. The only thing it did do was make the last 48 hours more interesting. I've had blood, mucus (hmm maybe I should have warned about graphic details again), cramping, contracting, pain and emotional highs and lows. The contractions have changed, however. So I am dealing with a new set of sensations and wondering if they are normal ... of course they are. All of it just means that James was not yet ready to greet the world, though I cannot imagine why with this beautiful weather we've been having.

For anyone who knows me, they know that I don't take too well to the 'unknown'. I hate not knowing what to expect, I hate not knowing what comes next and I hate not knowing when something is going to happen. I have always been like this, and I am sure that I will continue to be this way - at least to some extent - for the rest of my life.
But I made a conscious decision today (After being up since 4:30am, taking one walk and two naps) that I am going to let it go. I am causing myself unnecessary stress and anxiety when I should be relaxing. So I am currently sitting in my rocking chair not wondering why he is late and not stressing about every little pain wondering if its a stronger contraction or if they are more frequent ... I am just rocking next to the open balcony door, enjoying the fresh air and sunshine. Because guess what, I will know when I am having stronger contractions and my body will tell me when a pattern is starting to emerge. It's not like I can miss the window of opportunity of him being born ... when he decides to come, he is coming whether or not I am ready!

Another thing that was greatly stressing me out was Josh's paternity leave time. Unfortunately it's something that he had to put in for ahead of time to make sure that he was covered ... after all, he is the big boss man and not just anyone can cover his time off. So he started his two weeks of paid time off on Monday since that was the due date. So every day that James hasn't arrived is another day on the other side of Josh's two weeks that I will spend alone with our newborn. I'm not going to lie, the idea scared me. While we are both going to be brand new parents, Josh has more experience with babies than I do.
The reason the two week thing scared me, I think, is because everywhere you read that the first two weeks are the toughest as there is a huge adjustment in the family dynamics as well as routines etc. Not only that, but I will still be recovering from labor and delivery, will be sore from learning how to breast feed and may be over whelmed at the huge demands in my sleep deprived state. Not to mention that I'll be dealing with the mother of all periods after not having one in ten months and re-adjusting to my settling hormone levels. Yeah, lets just say that a new momma needs her support.
But regardless of whether or not Josh can be here for a two week period after the birth of James, I know that I will still have his support for the times of the day that he is here and the times that I call freaking out over something or other hahaha.

If nothing else comes of these two weeks with Josh being home, I think that we got some much needed quality time together which may prove to be more beneficial to our changing relationship and family in the long run. Now that I have chosen to join Josh in vacation mode, I think that we will be better prepared for our bundle of joy. No baby can be soothed by stressed out parents. And not to mention that it has been amazing having Josh here during the most difficult time of my pregnancy because, let me tell you, the last month is a roller coaster ride!

So to those of you who have told me to enjoy my last days of naps and relaxation and to have patience ... I am finally listening. All the extra time in the uterus just means that James is going to be extra special ... after all, Rome wasn't built in a day :)

Quite an exciting doctor visit.

**** WARNING: This blog entry may be graphic ... I am really not sure yet, but I wanted to give you a heads up just in case  ;-)  ****

Today's doctor visit was quite the exciting one. After spending yesterday dealing with back labor and other pains for almost 9 hours I was praying that my cervix had made some progress in the dilation area. If the doctor did an exam today and told that my cervix was still completely closed I probably would have cried. Nobody should have to go through all that cramping and throbbing pain and discomfort for nothing!

So the doctor did an internal exam, which is always pleasant  :-/   and gave me the good news ... I am dilated 3cm and 50% effaced. So I am well on my way. Just in case pregnancy is new for you: You need to be 10cm dilated before you start pushing the baby out. Of course there is no way to know where you are without an internal exam, but chances are that you will already be laboring fast and hard before you get to 6cm or 7cm ... don't quote me on that one, just because I do believe it is different for everyone. I think some women even get admitted to the labor and delivery ward at 5cm ... so I suppose it really depends on whether or not you waters have broken and what your contractions are like.
Effacement was something I had never heard of until a few months ago. This is the thinning of your cervix. So with mine being 50% effaced, it means that mine is half the thickness that it was to start with. But before your cervix starts to efface, it goes through a period of softening.
There is no set time for any of this process ... every single woman and every single pregnancy is completely different. This can all happen over a few days, a few weeks or even a few months! ... For me it all happened within 2 weeks. So those were two pieces of good news :)

Since I am 40 weeks and 1 day pregnant, my doctor offered me the option of having my membranes stripped (aka sweeping). Since it can be quite painful and uncomfortable (as are internal exams right now because James is putting so much pressure on my nether region) I said that we could revisit that idea when he was in there checking my cervix ... sorry, this is where it gets graphic :-/ 
I ended up deciding on a yes. I figured whats 5 more seconds of pain and discomfort if it brings the pregnancy to a happy end. So in a nut shell (if this is new to you), the doctor basically sticks one finger inside your cervix (so into your uterus) and gently ... though it didn't feel very gentle ... removes part of the membrane from the inside wall of the uterus. By doing this a hormone is released that makes the uterus think that you are in labor and can start the contractions. For more information: http://www.midwife.org/ACNM/files/ccLibraryFiles/Filename/000000000669/Stripping%20Membranes.pdf

Unfortunately stripping your membranes is not a guarantee. It will work if your body is already getting ready for labor. But after hearing all of my symptoms from the past week he decided that it was definitely worth a shot for me. If it does work then labor will kick in within 24-48 hours after the stripping. Though some women go into labor as soon as during the night because they are relaxed, or the next morning after a good night's sleep. I am very much hoping that the procedure worked for me because I don't want to be induced (that would happen at 41wks 6 days ... so April 28th) and I really don't want to be pregnant for that long!

The last thing that the doctor told me was that all the cramping etc that I am feeling is no longer false labor. He strongly believes that it is early labor now that I am 3cm. So that's awesome :)  Though early labor can last for a few days.
Since the doctor visit today I have been quite uncomfortable with cramping and some pain near the cervix etc. I have also had some bleeding which is normal. So I cleaned the house a little bit to keep moving and stay distracted. I also showered which made me feel tons better (the doctor's exam made me sweat!).

So with any luck, my next post will be a while from now and it will be about the birth of our little boy :)  Unless I feel the urge to blog during labor .... yeah, probably not going to happen.  ;-)

Who am I?!?!

I know I am in the homestretch, but that doesn't stop the hormones from ruining my day. There are moments when I don't recognise myself ... I don't understand how hormones can change one person so much, and so quickly. Unless something majorly stressful is happening in my life, I am only used to feeling like this maybe a day or two (tops) out of every month ... but 9 months of this has been ridiculous and I'm coming to the end of my rope.

I guess it would be okay if it only effected me, but that is not the case. My sudden change from happy to sad, to angry, to downright depressed, to excited, to anxious effects those around me too. The fluctuations cause me to snap at people I love, cry over the dumbest things and get overly excited about the smallest things and I cannot seem to control it no matter how much I try, and sadly I feel like it is taking its toll on some of my most treasured relationships.

The most difficult emotion for me is the sadness and crying. I have always been a person to keep my tears to myself whenever possible because once I've cried out whatever the frustration is I automatically feel better and move on without anyone ever knowing. I still have my private crying moments to allow for some of the hormonal craziness, but unfortunately there are still loved ones that get caught up in the cross hairs of my tears. Sometimes I feel like the tears are just sitting there waiting any dumb reason to get out, and sadly it seems to be when there are others around to witness the break down. Not only is it frustrating, it can be downright embarrassing to have to explain the dumb reason that I am upset.

It also seems that the tears like to stick around until I am completely dry. I could seriously cry for hours, especially if it's night time. The darkness and silence of the night can swallow you whole if you're careful ... I hate night time on nights like this ... I am already assuming that I wont get much sleep. But that's okay, because I'll just sleep all day tomorrow.

There are women out there that seem to enjoy every minute of pregnancy ... or is that just what they show in public? If they really are happy the entire time, why cant I be like them? I wish I could have spent my whole pregnancy being happy, comfortable, feeling beautiful, and getting along with everyone. I just want to be done. I want my beautiful son to be here, I want my body back and I want these emotional break downs to disappear.

I want to be ME again ... I want all my friendships/relationships to go back to normal ... and did I mention that I just want to be me again?

From one concern to another.

So for those of you who have been pregnant, you know that pregnancy can be one worry after another, especially when it comes to the first pregnancy because you don't always know what is normal and what is not. As new moms-to-be we spend a lot of time looking up all the aches and pains on google and calling our doctors about our new found symptoms.

Now that I have reached full term most of those worries have gone away. Reaching week 39 has alleviated a lot of concerns as I just sit back and wait for those telling signs of labor. Last night, however, I found myself laying in bed surrounded by a whole bunch of new concerns.

I often go back and forth between feeling ready for labor and delivery and completely terrified. Of course its the fear of the unknown ... I have no idea what is going to happen in that room. Every mom in the world could share her experience and I could still experience something very different. The pain that I might feel also scares me, even though I plan to have an epidural. Also tearing scares me for obvious reasons. But I am also aware that I will be surrounded by the best support I could ask for. Josh's hand will be in mine for as long and as much as I need it, my parents and sister will be there to cheer me on and encourage me to keep going when I am completely exhausted and my doctor, whom I trust beyond words, will be there to talk me through the whole process. So while I am scared at times, I am also confident that I can get through the whole labor and delivery without a problem.

Something new that I have started worrying about as the big day approaches are my abilities as a mom. Babysitting was never really my thing, though I did it often. Crying babies have always made me uncomfortable. What if James has a crying day ... how do respond if he doesn't respond to any kind of soothing? I know that it will be different because he is my child ... but I want the best for my son and wouldn't want to see him sad or uncomfortable.
I know that these are common concerns among new moms, so I am trying to let it go and understand that it will be a learning process and as I get to know James I will learn what soothing techniques work and what don't.

Having said all of that ... I am ready for James to arrive ... so James, we are just waiting for you little buddy :)

False Alarm

Yesterday was a whole new adventure in pregnancy ... not one that I really enjoyed, to be perfectly honest.

Josh got up to get ready for work at 6:30am. I woke up at 7am with what felt like menstrual cramping. I paid no attention to it at first because the Doctor told me that it could be due to dehydration which happens more in the mornings now that I am a snorer  :-/  So after sleeping for a little while longer I got up to drink some water thinking that it would ease my discomfort ... it didn't.
I continued about my morning with no real change to the cramping. So I text Josh just so that he was aware of what was going on just in case it was real labor. I started paying more attention to pain to see if it got worse and if there was any pattern to the frequency ... there wasn't any pattern and the pain stayed the exact same all day long.
The pain was in my lower abdominal and lower back ... but I had no bloody-show, no more mucus plug shedding and no water breaking, so I wasn't quite sure what was going on. I did decide to go to work, but only made it through 1.5 classes, after which Coach Elly took over so that I could go home.
The discomfort continued and settled in my middle/upper back for the evening. Thankfully Josh was able to give me a back rub. After going to bed I did have to get up to walk around a little bit before turning out the light to try ease the back pain so that I could get comfortable. It wasn't until about 3am or 4am that the cramping finally stopped. So I dealt with the cramping for just a few hours short of 24 hours. I understand that actual labor will be worse etc, but at least it will be worth it because I will get to hold my son when its all over. When this false labor was all over, all I got was relief with that nagging feeling that that wasn't the last time I would be dealing with that.

Here is a little bit of information on False Labor ... something that I didn't really know about or pay attention to until yesterday.

Signs of false labor include:

• Irregular and unpredictable contractions (for example, intervals between contractions of ten minutes, six minutes, two minutes, eight minutes, etc.)
• There is no progression of labor
• Contractions are felt as a generalized abdominal tightening
• Change in activity or body position causes contractions to slow down or stop
• There is no evidence of bloody show
• Membranes have not ruptured

Where do you feel the contractions? With true labor, the pain tends to begin high in your abdomen, radiating throughout your entire abdomen and lower back, or visa versa. In the case of false labor the contractions are often concentrated in the lower abdomen and groin.
http://www.americanpregnancy.org/labornbirth/falselabor.html

Needless to say, I feel like a whole new woman today and got lots of stuff done around the house etc. I have had two or three contractions all day long and nothing more than that. And I do look foward to real labor so that James can come out and into this world  :)   It wont be long now!

Seriously Getting Ready Now.

My friend, Pam, gave birth to her son yesterday. She was at exactly 39 weeks.
Since she text me to say that her water had broken the day before I have been moving a lot faster. It has lit a fire under me because we have gone through this whole pregnancy together. And now that she has given birth, I know that I am next.

I spent yesterday and today doing the first baby laundry. I washed the crib and bassinet sheets as well as all the swaddles and enough clothes to get us through the first week or so. Once all that stuff was dry and folded I picked the outfit that James will make his trip home in. I also picked a blanket for the occasion and a blanket that will be presented to our dog Brutus with James' scent before we bring James home. (It is proven that your furry family member will be less stressed at the arrival of a new human if he/she has had some time with the baby's scent before their arrival ... that blanket will forever become Brutus' blanket ... like a gift from James).

I also but the bed pads and sheets on both the crib and bassinet and have extras ready to go. The crib is now also complete with the musical mobile that matches the decor of the nursery :) So if James were to arrive tomorrow, we are ready :)

I have also completed my birth plan which I will share with my doctor at tomorrows appointment. My birth plan isn't specific and I know better than to expect it to be followed to a tee. It is for when I do have options. I havnt made any medical decisions on there except that I will, at some point, be requesting an epidural. My birth plan is basically "If it works for the nurses and doctors, THIS is what will make me most comfortable."

I, myself, I am now 37 weeks. This is considered full term, so it's up to James as to when he wants to come into the world. My symptoms vary from day to day. I have really good days, okay days and awful days. It usually has something to do with my physical comfort. My ribs and pelvis take a regular beating and my comfort that day really depends on where James has made himself comfortable. I am back to having random bouts of nausea and cannot eat like I could a few months ago. But thankfully, my emotional ups and downs have lessened and pretty much just coinside with my physical comfort level ... meaning that if I am physically uncomfortable all day, I am probably in a crappy mood.

Through out this entire blog (how ever many posts that has been), you'll be happy though perhaps a little surprised to know that there is much I have left out. If I have left something out it is probably due to the grossness factor or wanting to keep some things private. Though, unfortunately for my mom and Josh ... I have shared absolutely everything with them! What I am getting at is that I am not sure who said that pregnancy is beautiful, but I am guessing they had yet to experience it for themselves. Don't get me wrong ... I believe that pregnancy is a miracle, but there are many more beautiful things in the world.

To give you an idea of the kinds of things that I have kept from you  ;-)  Here is a quick list (without any details of course): Diarrhea, Urethra Pain, Gas, Mucus Plug, Other Vagina related stuff, Other kinds of Mucus ... and the list goes on. If those words alone don't gross you out then maybe I should have a seperate blog for you ... Though I am not sure that I could write about it without feeling grossed out myself  ;-)





Just 3 more weeks! Oh My!

I am 37 weeks pregnant today ... and no, I can't believe it either! Time has gone by so incredibly fast. Though I must admit that starting last week it has slowed down immensely. This is either due to the fact that I am finally ready for him to be here OR because I have entered a phase of perpetual discomfort.

James has lodged himself ... well his little butt at least ... right up inside my ribs, so much so that slouching of any kind causes great discomfort. Maybe I should have been paying attention when I had aunts telling me not to slouch as a kid, then perhaps sitting with good posture wouldn't feel so foreign. Until just a few nights ago I got relief by getting into bed and stretching out but now I am getting to the point where I can still feel him in my ribs while trying to sleep. Last night I couldn't sleep until around 1am and was wide awake again just before 5am. After staring into space until 6:20am I finally just got up. The only thing worse than not being able to sleep is getting frustrated about not being able to sleep. I figure I can take a nap later or just sleep like a rock tonight  :)

As you may know from previous blogs, I was having horrible indigestion until I started taking Prilosec OTC. Don't worry, the Prilosec still works great, however, with my stomach being squashed by my ever growing son I have run into a new problem. When I eat or drink anything I may not lean forward, bend over or even think about reaching down for anything for at least 30 minutes. Here is why: whatever I have ingested will try to make a quick escape as soon as I am not completely vertical. Now don't get too grossed out ... I am not throwing up. It is just like the stomach opening has turned from a one way door into a swinging door :-/
The worst part about this is that sometimes the ingested 'stuff' makes it back up far enough that some of it slides down my wind pipe rather than back into my stomach causing me to cough uncontrollably for five minutes or more. The best part about this is that I have been dealing with it for long enough that should I need to bend over for any reason, I know the feeling that something is about to make a re-appearance and can swiftly return to an upright position  :)

Something new to me in late pregnancy is snoring. Josh calls it karma from all the nights he has kept me awake, but I still feel bad any night that I know I've been snoring like a fog horn. How do I know? Because my throat and other parts of my airway are incredibly dry and sometimes a little sore. I am sure I have snored in the past especially when I had a cold or something, but nothing like this! This is probably due to a combination of the extra weight (I have now gained a whopping 30 pounds!) and the fact that pregnancy causes congestion and stuffiness for some odd reason. I just hope it stops as soon as James arrives!

Other than that stuff I am still thrudging a long ... or waddling rather, which more than one person has felt the need to point out (thank you, by the way, I love knowing that I walk like a duck!). I am not referring to family of course because I dont take any of that to heart when they say it ... if family cant make fun of you then what's the point in having family  ;)  But as a stranger or acquantice it is your duty to keep your pie hole firmly latched or I will most likely reply with something you wont like. LOL!

Anywho, upwards and onwards as they say. We are almost there and I just need to keep reminding myself of that  :)

WIC Program

The WIC Program is something I never heard about until I became pregnant. I found out about it at the beginning of my pregnancy, but didnt start taking advantage of it until now. WIC stands for "Women, Infants & Children" and is a program for pregnant women and children up to the age of 5 years. With the program you get WIC checks monthly or bi-monthly for groceries. The program is to ensure that you are eating healthy and getting what you need nutritionally based on the month of pregnancy you are in.

Up until now I didnt want to take advantage of the program because I was working full time and so was Josh and I didnt want to drain any funds that might go to another mother than needs it more. Now, however, I have stopped working at one job and will be done at the other on in just two weeks and I wanted to take off any kind of stress that that may cause. Not to mention that when you have a new baby, every little bit helps :)

I used the first of four (for the month) checks today and it was really very easy. They give you a book with lists of what you can and cannot buy and you just pick and chose based on what is on that particular check. Today, it saved us over $20 for some of the things that we get every time we go grocery shopping :)

You might be wondering why I am telling you all of this. I want to make sure that every pregnant woman who is elligable for the program takes advantage! I realize that not every doctor is going to remember to tell his/her patients about the program, so I am telling YOU so that you can take advantage or someone you know can take advantage. They will check your income etc to make sure you dont make too much money already, but if you are on the Medi-cal insurance you automatically qualify :) 

So take the help ... its a little bit of help, but its help none-the-less! And as mommy's-to-be we need to take advantage of all the help being offered ... it's good practice for once the little one has arrived!

Cankles don't look good on anyone.

Cankles don't look good on anyone ... so it's a good thing I can only see mine when I bend over.

It has been quite the roller coaster week! The week started off well, with an awesome pregnancy photo shoot with our cousin Jeni Allen  <3. The photos from that day look amazing and will be memories that we can share with James when he is older :)

However, the week went downhill from there. I started getting sensations in my lower abdomen that felt very different than the Braxton-Hicks contractions I started getting a few weeks ago. They started feeling more like menstrual cramps ... for my male readers, menstrual cramping is like a dull, achy and at times throbbing pain in your lower abdomen and lower back. These are the pains that we are told to watch out for as pregnant ladies ... these are the pains that should they become more painful, rhythmic, and closer together usually tell us that are heading into labor. But mine weren't at all rhythmic and the times they lasted for varied widely. So I lay on the couch trying to decide if they were just a new level of Braxton-Hicks or if they were indeed labor contraction. But after about 30-45 minutes, the pain slowly wore off and I was fine for the rest of the night. So I decided to stay home.

Along with the new abdominal pains, I have also been experiencing intestinal cramping (like I really need to go to the bathroom), some nausea and sharp stomach pains and an increase in water retention (nothing like toxemia, just more that I was having before). When I wake up during the night or first thing in the morning my knuckles are sore from the swelling trapping the nerves. My feet are also sore to walk on first thing in the morning and I haven't seen my ankles in quite some time. If I am standing at work too long, my feet, ankles and shins start to feel really tight from the swelling, which tells me that it is time to start cutting back on my working hours.

So yeah, it has definitely been a week of discomfort. Also because I am quite a small person and James is about 5pounds now and continuing to grow, most of his movements are sore. His kicks are no longer cute and tickly, they are sometimes downright painful and at times it feels like he will make his way out the side of my body.

I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow so it will be interesting to see what he has to say about all these new symptoms etc. I have a feeling he will tell me to work less. He will no doubt check my cervix to see if I have dilated at all (which will be normal) with having had the menstrual cramping. But we shall see!

All I can say is that I look forward to seeing my ankles again really soon!

Its getting a little cramped in there!

I am now 33.5 weeks along in my pregnancy. I have started growing quite rapidly ... to the point where if someone doesn't see me for a few days they notice a difference in the size of my belly. While I have started growing rapidly, my weight gain has slowed down. I was gaining 2+ pounds a week for a little while --- I am assuming it was while James was going through his growth spurt --- but I am back to gaining just a pound or so per week. I believe my total weight gain is now around 26 pounds  :)   I will post a picture on Thursday.

So I don't know if James has just been more active lately or if I am just feeling it more because he is bigger and stronger. Watching my stomach move and be deformed at times can be a little freaky, but entertaining for sure. Though a lot of his movements are uncomfortable and sometimes painful where before they were barely noticeable or just a tickle. He spends a lot of time kicking or pushing against my ribs and also pushing on and punching my bladder. There is nothing like walking out of the bathroom only to feel like I need to go back in.

When he is at his most active, it seriously looks like he is trying to get out. If he continues to get stronger, I'm afraid he will push out through my skin just to get more space. Josh doesnt think that he will wait until April because my body will only allow for so much growing and James will get fed up of trying to fit in there. He will, after all, be full term in 2.5 weeks (36 weeks), so being born any time after that is fair game. And to be completely honest, I will be okay if he wants to come out a little before his due date because I am becoming tired of the continious discomfort (lower pelvis, ribs, upper back, lower back, hips etc etc etc). Our friend Heather thinks he will be here on March 17th because he is Irish after all, but our friend Shelly wants him to wait until his due date of April 16th because that's her birthday  :)   So we shall see.

If I had to pick a date, I would pick March 21st because that is my grandfather's birthday  <3   But as we know ... he will come out whenever he is ready to. I just really hope that it is on or before April 16th!

Baby Shower.

Can you believe that it has been a week and a day since our baby shower and this is the first time that I've had a chance to sit and write about that awesome day! It was a lot of fun and thank you again to my parents for putting the whole thing together and inviting everyone into their home. Josh and I very much appreciated their generosity, love and support.

Josh and I couldn't believe how much we got at the shower! We weren't expecting so many wonderful gifts. We were really feeling the love that day. It took me a week to organize and put the gifts away into their new homes. I think it also made everything seem a little more real. And can you believe that we received over 1400 diapers?!?!?!?! Oh my gosh! And they are split pretty evenly between the 'newborn' size and sized 1 and 2. So we are pretty set for a little while. I couldn't believe it when I organized and counted them. That is a ridiculous number of diapers and I love it!

Thank you everyone for your kindness, generocity, love and support. James is going to be one lucky little duckie! <3

Seeing everyone that was able to make it to the party was awesome. There were people that I hadnt seen in a very long time. I tried to catch up with everyone at some point through-out the afternoon/evening, but there were about 40 people there at one point, making it difficult to to get to everyone. So I do apologize to anyone that I didnt get a chance to sit down with. Again, I was blown away by the amount of people that came to celebrate with us  :) 

 
 

The food from Silvergreens was delicious! And by the looks of it at the end of the night, everyone agreed with me  :)  Silvergreens is one of my favourite places to eat in Santa Barbara. The cake was also amazing. I love carrot cake and again, everyone agreed with me :)  It was very pretty and also very delcious! I do believe the whole entire cake was eaten in the week following the shower.

I was completely exhausted for about 3-4 days following the shower. I slept a lot and took naps. I was much like Brutus after all the excitement hahaha. Now the next milestone in this journey is the birth of our son. I can't believe it and I cant wait!  <3  Bring on parenthood!

Feeling Under the Weather

In just a few days I will be 8 months along in my pregnancy ... and this morning I woke with my first cold of the pregnancy (and hopefully the last). I think I am very lucky to have gone this whole time without a single cold because when you're pregnant, your immune system is down and so it is a lot easier to catch illnesses. The reason I feel lucky is because I am around people all day every day ... all kinds of people at the restaurant and then children in the afternoon and I have come in contact with a lot of sick people. So my immune system deserves a standing ovation  :)

However, it still sucks that I have a cold. At 4am I got up to use the restroom, and that was when I realized that it wasn't allergies I was dealing with yesterday evening when I was sniffling and sneezing. So when Josh got up at 6:30am he brought me 2 tylenol. I took those before even getting up because I knew getting rid of the headache and some of the aches and pains would help me get up, eat breakfast and get ready for work in a timely manner and that all of that would hopefully make me feel better. It made me feel well enough to get myself to work.
Unfortunatly it was downhill from there. Moving around, communicating with guests and standing made me feel quite a bit worse and so I spent my shift counting down to 2pm. Thankfully though, I managed to get my 2 gymnastics classes covered, so that I could spend the rest of the day resting. And I honestly dont think it wouldnt have been fair to my girls for me to try teaching them while feeling as bad as I did.

Before becoming pregnant I loved to medicate my colds because I dont like to slow down. Some of my favorite cold meds were decongestants, anticeptic throat spray, excerdrine, and niquil ... all of which are off limits. So I had to find a whole new way to get better. I dont think I have been doing too badly. While I probably could have eaten a lot healthier, I did drink a ton of water and am still downing it. I also took some extra vitamin C along with my prenatals - Don't worry, I had asked my doctor about extra vitamin C a while ago because it's my 'go to' when I think I may be getting sick - and took those two tylenol pills. I took a nap before work this morning and again this afternoon when I got home. Despite feeling pretty warm I have kept myself covered up but have also been getting plenty of fresh air. I have spent the majority of my afternoon/evening lying down and just resting ... all chores may wait.  And of course Brutus has been keeping me company and has been my couch and nap buddy.

I plan on getting to bed at a decent time tonight after I drink some tea with lemon and honey, and I dont have to be up in the morning. So I am really hoping that all of this rest will help me feel better as soon as possible. Especially before this weekend, because I want to be able to fully enjoy the baby shower :)  I think the excitement for that will help me recover sooner too.

In the mean time I am going to keep resting. I will take 2 more tylenol and a vitamin C before bed and use vick's vapor rub if breathing becomes a problem. --- Watch out Josh, you thought being pregnant made me snore more ... let's see what level fog horn I can be tonight  ;)

If it's not within reach ... I don't need it.

I am starting to feel the pregnancy exhaustion for real now. Yeah, I got tired before ... but oh my goodness, now I just feel like the most unfit person in the world. I shall give you a few examples ... and feel free to giggle cause I cant help but laugh at myself on most days.

Just a few minutes ago, I realised that I was getting uncomfortable and could really use a cushion behind my back (I am sitting on the couch). However, the cushion is waaaay over there - on the other side of the couch - and so I decided to see if I would just suddenly become comfortable by sitting here long enough. The thought of having to use my stomach muscles to sit up, swing my legs around and reach is just too much work. Keeping in mind that I said the thought alone was too much work.

There are days when I am coaching and am just exhausted for no other reason than I am carrying an extra 24 pounds on my midriff, and so when the girls are warming up I'll pop a squat on the floor. On more than one occasion, I have accepted help from my 10 year olds to pull me up off the floor (I really need to not sit on the floor anymore!) which is a little embarrassing, but I am also very proud that they would offer  :)
There are other days when I try to think of what we can work on in that particular area of the gym so that I don't have to get up ... yeah, it can be a little pathetic.

Running errands has become my least favorite chore. Simply because it can involve so much walking and standing. There was one afternoon where my last stop was Walgreen's and I got to the point where I was literally shuffling around with squinty eyes. I am pretty sure I could have stood still, closed my eyes and gone to sleep right there in the middle of Walgreen's.
Those days are the toughest, because the exhaustion can become so overwhelming. Those are the days where I usually take 1-2 hour naps. I used to limit my naps to before 5pm, but now I could nap from 8pm-9pm and go to bed without any trouble at 10pm. I guess this is a good thing because I really need to be taking advantage of naps and bed time etc ... which I am :)

The last example I have of my growing laziness is when I need to turn over in bed at night. As you may well imagine the position of laying on my back is very uncomfortable (and not allowed in pregnancy). So I spend a lot of time on my right and left sides. Even though turning over requires just seconds on my back, it takes such an effort and puts a ton of pressure on my bladder that I really have to think about whether or not the turning will be worth it.
Dr. Samawi gave me a new technique to ease that pressure and that would be to turn onto my hands and knees and then to the other side ... and boy does that sound even more exhausting at 3am!
So there are nights when I gladly take a dead arm or leg over the inconvenience of turning over. Lazy right? But I'm pregnant, so I'm allowed to be lazy.

Though the only time I am not lazy at night or during the day is when it comes to going to the bathroom. If I get the urge to go, I go! I have not had an accident yet and don't plan to!!! Apparently it's very common for women to pee their pants while pregnant ... I understand why, because when James makes a sudden movement I sometimes get that feeling of when you are just about to pee. Even Dr. Samawi warned me about that at my last appointment so that I don't confuse my amniotic fluid leaking with my urine ... um eeuw! And even though Josh has so kindly offered to go out and buy me some (on multiple occasions), I will not being wearing Depends any time in the near future ... or ever!  :)

Updates :)

I am 31 weeks today and I had my 4 week prenatal check-up.

Dr. Samawi said that I am right on track. We listened to James's heartbeat which is at 145 bpm ... perfect! I also had Dr. Samawi feel to see if James is already head down because any time he gets the hick-ups now I can feel it really low down and he has been kicking my ribs. And sure enough, he is head down. Because I am only 31 weeks, there is a possibility that he will turn again and again, but if he is comfortable he will just stay where he is.

With the size of my uterus thus far, Dr. Samawi is predicting a 6-7 pound baby which would be awesome. But due to my small stature, he said that if it looks like James will be any bigger than that, that they will offer me the option of a c-section, which I am open to. I will do whatever it takes to ensure my health and the health of my baby  :)

As far as my own weight gain goes, I have gained a total of 24 pounds. Dr. Samawi said that I am right on track and that because I gained the weight at a steady rate and haven't over done it so far that the weight will fall off me in the first month after birth. Can you believe that during birth I will drop around 10 pounds?! Between the baby and the fluids etc. And then with breast feeding etc I will drop another 10 pounds within a week of that first 10. So he said I'll be back to myself in no time.
Because I have been feeling so uncomfortable lately - between the swelling, the heavy tummy and the hardship of moving around etc - I very much look forward to getting back to myself :)

We are in the home stretch now ... 9 weeks and counting! I can't wait to meet our little guy :)

Surviving the Third Trimester.

I cannot believe that we are in the 3rd trimester! Today I am 30 weeks and 1 day pregnant ... when you break that down, it means that I have 10 weeks - give or take a few weeks - to go before birth, and just 6 weeks before I could start my maternity leave. I cannot believe how fast this has all been going! It seems like only yesterday that I crawled into the bed next to Josh at 730am to tell him we were pregnant and now we are starting our sprint for the finish line.

I started the third trimester 2 weeks ago (28 weeks) and believe it or not, a whole new set of symptoms started around that time ... maybe even a little bit before. I have started growing at a significantly faster rate, and with that have come feelings of physical heaviness, some lower and middle back discomfort, sore, tired and swollen feet, physical tiredness and a growing sense of anxious excitement.
I am incredibly excited to finally meet my son, though am increasingly nervous about the whole giving birth part! hahaha! For the most part I am just taking the aches and pains as they come because I knew I would hit this point. Also, I know that it will be very much worth it  :)

So I have put together (in my mind) a new set of survival skills to help me finish out this pregnancy as comfortably as possible. Here are some of the ones that I follow on a daily basis:

1. I start each day with a big breakfast ... a bowl of cereal (usually a mix of a healthy and sweet sweet cereal) with my lactose free milk. And I also have a side of 2 slices of whole grain toast and a nice big glass of water to wash that and my prenatals down.
2. I drink plenty of fluids through out the day ... mostly water, but sometimes juice and tea also.
3. If I am working all day, I make sure to take sit down and snack breaks whenever possible to take the pressure off legs and feet and lower back. And of course to stop me from turning into a bear when my blood sugar levels drop.
4. When I get home, the first thing I do is sit down and put my feet up.
5. I do my best to get a decent amount of relaxation time every evening and get to bed at a good time to ensure a full night's rest.

So I am doing what I can to take care of myself. I have also taken to just accepting my emotions. If there is a time (when I'm alone) where I feel I just need to cry, then I do it. I almost always feel tons better afterwards. And I havent been depriving myself of any foods except the foods that are dangerous while pregnant. I am just doing what I need to do to feel good.
I do try to get some exercise in when I can. It's usually walking, prenatal pilates or prenatal yoga. But I no longer push the exercise ... if I am feeling up to it then I do it, but if I am too tired then I feel that resting is much more important.

Before I sign off there is a cool fact that I learned recently that made me feel good. Did you know that once you are in the third trimester, should the baby be born as a pre-me, the survival rate goes up to 90%  :)   Not that I want him to be born early, but it puts the whole preterm labor fear more in the back of my mind rather than right up front any time I feel a cramp or a new sensation. I cant wait to meet my baby :)

I'm allowed to complain ... I'm pregnant!

I feel like for the majority of this pregnancy I haven't done much complaining about my aches and pains ... of course I mean in person because on here (this blog) everything is exaggerated as I am pretty selective as to what I write about and when I want to write. But there are days when I just need to complain ... I would like to take this chance to use my free complain pass  :)

So a few appointments ago my doctor told me to start taking Pepsid AC for my heartburn. Up until a week or two ago it worked great ... and then it started losing its effectiveness and I ended up back where I started ... feeling like a fire breathing dragon every evening (at the same time, no matter what I ate that day) and through out the majority of the night, who's esophagus is filled with an acid slowly burning a whole near the entrance to my stomach. I spend my evening and night alternating between tums and glasses of milk.
So the next step was Prolisec OTC. It's a 14 day treatment that reduces the amount of acid in your stomach and repairs any damage caused by the acid that tries to make its way to your throat. This morning I took the first dose, though sadly it takes 1-4 days to take full effect and I am currently sitting here wishing I hadn't eaten at all today ... though I would probably still have acid indigestion.
Anyway, fingers crossed that it starts to take effect soon and that it fixes the problem ... because I cannot feel like this every evening for the next 2.5 months .... I will become one very very angry fire breathing dragon.

As you know, if you have seen me lately, I have gained quite a belly. Especially in the past few weeks. Though I am now starting to gain a little more weight in the breasts, buttocks, and face. So despite what we all say about the pregnant woman being beautiful, I have not been feeling very pretty lately.
Between the periodically swollen feet, the round face and the ever expanding waste line, I am looking more and more forward to getting back in shape after the pregnancy (when it's safe and in a timely manner).

It doesn't help that the other day a person who sees me every couple of weeks made a comment about my rounder face. She didn't mean it in a bad way ... I think she was trying to tell me that I look good because she threw in words like 'motherly', but never the less, I ended up feeling a little crappy. I expect to gain weight in my midriff etc, but I really don't need to know that you can see a double chin forming. Just tell me that I am glowing or something.

Anyway, my mom and dad are coming to visit this weekend and mom has offered to give me a pedicure to help me feel pretty. And even though there is no way in the whole wide world that I would wear flip flops right now, knowing that my toes are pretty will help me feel pretty. I think every pregnant woman should feel pretty ... heck, I think every woman should feel pretty ... And sometimes its the little things that help ... perhaps a face mask will help also  :)

I Tested it ... It Passed!

For pretty much my entire pregnancy I have dealt with a dry nose, congestion, bloody nose and a whistling nose. While it happens 24/7, it can be worse at night when I am trying to get to sleep. And as I am sure a lot of you know, there is nothing like a whistling nose when you are trying to relax. I don't know about you, but it drives me insane!

So I decided to check my options. If I wasn't pregnant, I would use decongestants among other stuff to ensure a good nights sleep. But being pregnant, I have to check the safest options. I read that Vick's Vapor Rub is safe, but I am not a big fan of that stuff unless I have a really bad cold where your nose is completely blocked when you lie down, and I am definitely not that bad.

So then I found a message board where someone mentioned using Vaseline Petroleum Jelly. You blow your nose and then take a Q-Tip, dip it in the Vaseline and put it on the inside walls of your nose. That sounded like something I could try. So two nights ago I gave it a try and it worked! My nose felt clearer, the whistling stopped and I felt like I was getting more oxygen. So just to make sure that it wasn't a fluke, I tried it again last night and it worked again! Who knew that something so simple would work so well!

There is only one negative side to using the Vaseline, and that is the initial smell of the petroleum jelly when your nose clears. But that passes pretty quickly. I have also noticed less morning nose bleeds because the Vaseline helps to keep my nose moisturized which in turn stops the bleeding caused by a dry nose.

I will continue doing this until I stop having a congested nose. It's safe and doesn't involve any medical chemicals and because I am not ingesting anything, neither is James.  :)  I love finding little home remedies!

Cannot sit still for Five Minutes!

Nesting Season has begun! ... This means that I constantly have the urge to clean and organize every corner of the apartment, but the nursery more than anywhere else. I will sit down for maybe five minutes before thinking of something else that I just MUST do at that very moment. It is an exciting feeling and also cool in the sense that I am getting stuff done before I become too uncomfortable to move.




The Bassinet will be moved into our room either before James arrives or when we have a crib (which ever comes first), but for now it looks lovely in the baby room. The chest of drawers will contain all of Jame's little clothes and don't you just love the lamp?! I think it's awesome! It's flexible and has multiple settings.


Gifts from my registry at Babies R Us started to arrive today (thank you!) and that gave me even more motivation to get stuff ready. So I have been unpacking things to make room for more baby stuff and have been putting items, such as clothes, in the chest or drawers.

I have organized the towels, wash cloths and burping cloths on top of the chest of drawers for now, but I plan on moving those into the hallway closet before James arrives. For now, I just like seeing everything out in the nursery where I can look at it. It makes me feel very excited :)

I love the little bassinet. At the moment I do have a blanket on the side and teddy bears sitting inside the crib, but that is just for me again. Once James is sleeping in the crib, all of that will be removed for safety. But seeing the little crib with the little teddies makes everything so much more real (just incase my bulging stomach didnt!) and is just another step that I think every mother-to-be has to go through.

We all go through our moments of anxiety and disbelief and feeling like it's a dream. But I believe the nesting period is almost like a period of acceptance. It is the time where we stop pinching ourselves and truley realize that we are about to become parents. There are still moments when I get those excited butterflies and find myself thinking, "Oh My Goodness, I'm having a baby." But that is because I am now less than three months away and realizing how much time has just flown until now, I cannot imagine that time would slow down ... and I most certainly don't want it to.

It feels good to be getting things done in preparation for the arrival of our son. I feel like a little girl waiting and preparing for the arrival of Christmas ... which until the birth of my son will have been my favorite time of year. :)

Look at that little smile!

I have had two doctor appointments in the last two days. Yesterday I had my ultrasound which is always amazing. It was the last ultrasound for this pregnancy, so the last chance to see James before he makes his way into the world in just over 3 months.
Everything looks great according to Nikki, the technician. James is in the 64th percentile as far as his growth goes, so that is a little above average. Hopefully that doesn't mean an 8 or 9 pound delivery weight!!! Hahahaha, though babies who are born bigger tend to sleep through the night a lot sooner which would definitely be a plus. At the moment, James is about 2.5 pounds ... so tiny!



James Thomas at 26.5 weeks. Can you believe that he smiled for the camera :)

Today's appointment was one of my routine monthly visits with Dr. Samawi. We do the same thing every visit: I pee in a cup, blood pressure, weight, temperature, baby's heart rate, uterus measurements and questions. Dr. Samawi said that everything is going really well and he couldn't be happier. He is an awesome doctor and I am excited to have him in the delivery room when the day arrives :)

So you remember when I was tested for anemia? It turns out that I am anemic and had to start taking iron pills twice a day. Anemia is very common among pregnant women, especially around the 27th week, which is right where I am. Here are some of the symptoms of anemia:

Easy fatigue and loss of energy  --- Yes!

Unusually rapid heart beat, particularly with exercise  --- Sometimes.

Shortness of breath and headache, particularly with exercise --- Sometimes.

Difficulty concentrating --- No more than usual, lol.

Dizziness --- Yes, but not too often.

Pale skin --- A few people mentioned that I was looking pale.

Leg cramps --- Especially at night time!

Insomnia --- Only in the past week or so.

So as you can see, I experienced most of the basic symptoms. The ones that bother me the most are the fatigue and the leg cramps and then more recently the insomnia.
With the fatigue there are days where I feel completely useless and just want to sleep. There are days when I might take multiple naps and go to bed early. My head barely hits the pillow and I am out like a light!
The leg cramps haven't been very bad, just more of an annoyance and discomfort when I am trying to relax at night. Some nights I toss and turn with a lot of frustration.
And with the insomnia, it is where I will wake up between 4am-5am and not be able to get back to sleep for quite some time.

So hopefully the iron intake will alleviate some of (if not all) these symptoms. The doctor also prescribed me something to hopefully ensure that constipation wont become an issue due to the added iron.

So that's me. No more doctors appointments this week. So it will be nice to have a break from the doctor's office. :)

Frustrated at Work.

The past week has been pretty stressful due to my restaurant job. In the past 1.5 weeks I have driven home after work 3 times with tears streaming down my face. That cannot be healthy. So here is what is going on.

Over the holidays we got a new general manager at our store because the previous GM was promoted. Over the holidays I requested some time off to visit my family and noticed that the week I returned to work, I was not yet put back on the schedule for those days. But I didn't say anything because I understand that they have to work me back in where they had replaced me for the days I was gone. However, it has been over 2 weeks now and I am still only on the schedule 2 days a week.

The weeks leading up to Christmas the other GM and I were under an agreement to put me on the schedule as much as possible while I was feeling great physically because we knew the time would come when I would have to cut down on my hours due to late pregnancy discomforts. So the GM had me on the schedule 5-6 times a week so that I could save money for the time that I will be on maternity leave.

(History lesson real quick: I have worked at the restaurant for over a year now, which is longer than all other employees bar two. Before becoming pregnant I was next in line for the promotion to shift lead and was in the middle of being trained when I conceived. The GM and I decided that is would be best to put my training on hold, since being a shift lead requires lifting of heavy plates/trays etc and we wanted to make sure that I stayed safe ... so I was obviously good at my job. The GM also often left me in charge while he had to run errands during the day, which tells me that he still saw me as someone capable of leading others and getting my work done whether or not he was present).

So I spoke to the old GM about my schedule concerns and we talked about how I am wanted to save and prepare for when I am not working. He completely agreed and said that I should have been back in the schedule. He said that he has seen my lack of shifts and had spoken to the new GM already and that I should have at least 5 shifts this week ... That didnt happen ... I still only have 2 shifts this week.

The old GM explained to me last week that the new GM is going through a period of getting to know everyone and I understand that. He doesnt know who we are or what we are capable of. But the old GM had also said that he informed the new GM about me and the agreement we were under. But the new GM has been there for 3 weeks now and has worked with everyone on multiple occasions.

To make matters worse, after I had picked up a shift last week, the new GM told me that I couldnt work that shift and completely took me off the schedule for that day ... (he had scheduled me AGAINST my availibilty despite having all that information in the office. So I had switched with someone so that I wouldnt lose 1 of my 2 shifts that week) ... He informed me of his mistakes the day before that shift and said that I didnt need to come in. I was very annoyed but contained myself and continued working on my side work without saying much.

Then as I was getting ready to leave for work a few of us were talking when the new GM interjected, "I dont even know who you are [as a worker], you are sooo moody." ... I was blown away by this statement and didnt really respond to it as I was left speechless. Unless I feel like complete and total crap physically, I keep a positive attitude at work to ensure excellent customer service and I get all my work done. I have never had issues with any of the employees and I havnt had any crazy pregnant moments at work. So I have no idea why he would say that to me.

I was told by my friends later that day that it is a form of descrimination since moodiness is a symptom of pregnancy. (Even though any moodiness has been minimal). The descrimination thing hadnt really crossed my mind. I just feel like I am getting picked on or singled out. I cried on and off for hours after leaving work that day. I was hurt at his personal attack and embarrassed that maybe I have been moody (but according to other employees, this isnt true). My self-esteem was completely shot.

I feel like I am having to re-prove my abilities to work at this restaurant when my numbers and over-all sales really say it all. I have never had a customer or employee complaint and I have never been reprimanded for not finishing a tast. So why do I feel like I am on probation? Why do I feel like I am being punished? Am I being descriminated against or am I just being bullied? I hate going to work now, but I cannot afford to quit my job. Going to work depresses me and I know this cant be good for my baby James.

What do you think? What should I do? --- I have inquired about switching stores, but will that fix my problem? Advice/input greatly appreciated.